hey ya, its me. its one of those nights that i cant sleep yet again. i went to my blog and read back all my archives. my blog used to be a happy one. ever since july 2008, it started to be filled with all those shiat about him. every post is all rambling about him and him and him. fucking hate myself for being so shallow. how did i allow myself to be so easily hurt by him? can you imagine? my day can be ruined by just one small action of his. or maybe by something which he casually said. 

and worst of all, its also fucking pathetic to wait for replies on facebook every single day. why did i allow myself to stoop so low? how did i allow my life to be controlled by him?! and now, i cant sleep every night also because of him. 

i need to be a stronger woman. if he likes you, he will try all means to tell you. if he doesnt, it means that you need to move on. dont keep thinking that maybe he likes you but doesnt have the courage to tell you. yes. i am so glad that i went back to read my archives and wake up from this misty nightmare. sigh. 

still.... easier said that done. give me 2 months. 2 months and i shall not talk about him anymore.

san.